Some seepages cannot be sealed.
Somethings you cannot be impervious to.
Some wounds don't heal. Everytime you go back in the hope of finding reconciliation, glimpses of a cracked, battered past show up.
The experiences are still loud enough to deafen you, still dark enough to petrify you, still recent enough to make you lose sense of time that has already passed since and still intimate enough that each breath it takes is a stab on your share of air.
Ignorance, repression, anger, sadness, guilt, helplessness, madness - some experiences are a complete package!
If there were an escape mechanism, you'd have chosen it and saved yourself from the turmoil.
Alas! the FIRE EXIT even if available and chosen wouldn't help. Everything you left loose-ended will bite you back right in the ass sooner or later.
"Time is the greatest healer", they say. But, is it really? May be what they mean is with time you gain more perspective, find out there's more to the world than your misery. Happiness in small things or more misery, bigger misery!
So, may be relatively your problems would be healed. Or will they be?
Some fuck ups are too big (for you) to let them be treated merely "by time"!
So, even if the problem diminishes, the implications of it you bear! It's too easy and cheesy to say "to be dealt by the therapeutic, endless time!"
Confrontation may be a solution but how do you confront something that sucks the rationality out of you, leaving you caught in the mire of blinding angst?!
Problem may be yours solely or inherited along with the associated indoctrination like a help manual with any device wanting you to mop up the screw up; it teaches you lessons, contributes in a large way to who you are or will be.
Then there are moments when everything seems serene on the surface but past experiences suggest otherwise.
Like too much tranquility is too much booze. You are now bound to puke! Like feeling good is an evil omen, that it will have consequences; unleashing all that you hoped had gone away.
And yet, people expect you to move on. They are obviously unaware of the conflicts it rose within you, the whirls it brought in your head, the uneasiness that shook you to the bone, the delusion it brought, the hatred it stirred inside and the clarity it brought which is as hard to escape as death itself. People may be deeply moved by your "story" and then might begin the "healing" from their side. Without any offense, somethings are better left untouched, uncorrected because pity is the worst fruit of any misery!
Problem sometimes is not of the pain being alive but the urge of people to kill it. Some thorns cannot be plucked because the catharsis it intends is no longer desired as they entwine with the fibre of your being, the form so intricate of this symbiotic relationship that parting with it would mean the collapse of your identity!
Somethings you cannot be impervious to.
Some wounds don't heal. Everytime you go back in the hope of finding reconciliation, glimpses of a cracked, battered past show up.
The experiences are still loud enough to deafen you, still dark enough to petrify you, still recent enough to make you lose sense of time that has already passed since and still intimate enough that each breath it takes is a stab on your share of air.
Ignorance, repression, anger, sadness, guilt, helplessness, madness - some experiences are a complete package!
If there were an escape mechanism, you'd have chosen it and saved yourself from the turmoil.
Alas! the FIRE EXIT even if available and chosen wouldn't help. Everything you left loose-ended will bite you back right in the ass sooner or later.
"Time is the greatest healer", they say. But, is it really? May be what they mean is with time you gain more perspective, find out there's more to the world than your misery. Happiness in small things or more misery, bigger misery!
So, may be relatively your problems would be healed. Or will they be?
Some fuck ups are too big (for you) to let them be treated merely "by time"!
So, even if the problem diminishes, the implications of it you bear! It's too easy and cheesy to say "to be dealt by the therapeutic, endless time!"
Confrontation may be a solution but how do you confront something that sucks the rationality out of you, leaving you caught in the mire of blinding angst?!
Problem may be yours solely or inherited along with the associated indoctrination like a help manual with any device wanting you to mop up the screw up; it teaches you lessons, contributes in a large way to who you are or will be.
Then there are moments when everything seems serene on the surface but past experiences suggest otherwise.
Like too much tranquility is too much booze. You are now bound to puke! Like feeling good is an evil omen, that it will have consequences; unleashing all that you hoped had gone away.
And yet, people expect you to move on. They are obviously unaware of the conflicts it rose within you, the whirls it brought in your head, the uneasiness that shook you to the bone, the delusion it brought, the hatred it stirred inside and the clarity it brought which is as hard to escape as death itself. People may be deeply moved by your "story" and then might begin the "healing" from their side. Without any offense, somethings are better left untouched, uncorrected because pity is the worst fruit of any misery!
Problem sometimes is not of the pain being alive but the urge of people to kill it. Some thorns cannot be plucked because the catharsis it intends is no longer desired as they entwine with the fibre of your being, the form so intricate of this symbiotic relationship that parting with it would mean the collapse of your identity!
very trueee....
ReplyDeletebt tujhe ky hua.....kis baat ka gam h tujhe...:P
Time is the greatest heel and sabotages the past miseries.
ReplyDeleteBeing rational to confront the problems of your life is not the best way to deal with them at times.Sometimes a mind without thoughts can work wonders.
The idea of bringing thoughtlessness in mind to achieve tranquility sounds great but the path to achieve that is difficult,that's what we think. A materialistic world is bound to
throw fuck ups at you either leave it or face it. If you can't leave it learn to accept it.
The mere acceptance of miseries and less expectance from life can bring wonders.
Keep striving to take long strides.
Keep moving ..
Lets wait for time..
give it a chance to wreck the miseries..
Don't lose hope..
And the best way to deal with them is start overlooking them...
Look at the positiveness around..
jainrahulsethi@gmail.com
So.. what I am about to say, is probably gonna contradic itself, but as long you understand what I'm abt, I'd say its all good.
ReplyDeleteYes, some things do hurt, and no, time only dulls it, and you forget just how bad it was, until one day you suddenly remember once again, and are incapacitated by the horror of 'it'.
Sometimes tho, you learn new things, you gain more experience, and yes, perspective, and you move on. Yeah it was bad, but things are better now, and you don't want to rehash the past. You like the present more, and that's where you're gonna stay.
But usually, it all becomes a part of you. You don't need pity, or sympathy, or heck even empathy. Simple understanding is more than enough, even if the understanding is to say, "I don't get it, but I'm at your side and that's where I'll stay."
There are a LOT of positive quotes around, love, and I'll find truck loads of them for you if you want. But you're right, and you don't need any of that. You're you, and that's more than enough :)
This is what is "Life" is...
ReplyDeleteIf you don't follow these defined ways of moving on and believe that time isn't a healer then I don't think there are better ways to cope up from bitter memories..
Struggle is the second name of life, negative feelings will hurt but its your decision that you wanna play it with enthusiasm or depression
Seriously heart touching
ReplyDeletepain and happiness r d part and parcel of life
life is d second name of struggle & life becomes boring without struggle
Positive thinking is the best way to overcome such misery